Summary: Happy, smutty ending!
Rating: NC-17, baby! Chew on that, smut fans!
Note: What the hell are you reading the note for? J/S pr0n awaits! OK, thanks to everyone for slogging through all the non-smut chapters. I *heart* you. A lot.
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Sawyer was dimly aware of a blur of motion around him. Mostly the blur looked like Jack. Either he was forcing some kind of tea down Sawyer’s throat or rubbing eucalyptus on his chest, or just hovering, that familiar look of concern on his face.
Sometimes the blur was Kate or even Sun fussing over him. Sawyer had no concept of time, only that he was constantly either too hot or too cold and that his lungs felt like they were on fire. He thought he heard Jack say “pneumonia.” He heard his own chest rattling, felt like he was breathing underwater. Thought he heard someone crying over him.
Mostly Sawyer was aware of how gentle Jack’s hands were and how his eyes burned with dedication. Or maybe that was just the fever. Everything seemed to be burning. Or drowning.
Sawyer had no idea how long it had been since he last really opened his eyes. He looked around him, as if seeing his tent for the first time. His fever was gone. He felt weak, but otherwise OK. He had lost weight and his beard felt fuller. The scars from the bear attack were fading. He dared to take a deep breath and found that his ribs gave him only the mildest protest. How long had he been out of it, he wondered?
Jack was napping on the floor next to him. Sawyer thought it was high time he got up. He stood up slowly, but the tent spun dangerously. He took a step backwards and, misjudging the distance, fell heavily back onto the airplane seat with a crash.
Jack was instantly awake and looked around in a panic. When he saw Sawyer on his back, legs sprawled over the upended chair, he jumped up and ran to his aid.
Sawyer’s futile attempts to right himself would have been funny if Jack wasn’t so worried about him. “Here,” Jack said, offering his hand. Sawyer grabbed it and Jack pulled him upright.
“Thanks, doc,” Sawyer mumbled. He rubbed his chin, still adjusting to the fullness of his beard as Jack fixed the chair and guided him back to it.
“How long have I been sick?” he asked as he settled back down.
“Almost two weeks,” Jack answered, as he ran a virtual checkup on Sawyer. He still had the serious air of a doctor, but he couldn’t conceal his happiness that Sawyer was better. “How are you feeling?” he asked.
“I could pass for human,” Sawyer mused. He caught a glimpse of the now-healed cut on Jack’s arm and it all came back to him. He braced himself for the inevitable lecture of “How could you be so stupid?” and “I’m very disappointed in you.”
But the lecture didn’t come. Instead Jack was every inch the kindly doctor, taking his pulse, seeing if he still had a fever. He seemed pleased to hear that Sawyer’s ribs were nearly healed.
“So where is it?” Sawyer asked with a scowl, tired of waiting for Jack to tear into him.
“Where’s what?” Jack asked, puzzled.
“You’re not gonna chew me out for runnin’ off and bein’ a complete idiot? And slashin’ up your arm?”
“Oh, that,” Jack said thoughtfully. “Well, I imagine you feel pretty badly about that already.”
“Well ... yeah, I guess.” Sawyer was still off balance from Jack’s lack of hostility. He waited for a minute and then the apology forced itself out of his mouth. “I’m sorry,” he said softly. “I never meant to cause you all that grief. I just had to get away.”
Jack nodded. “I’m sorry if I pushed too hard. You know I only wanted to help.”
Sawyer ducked his head. He was overwhelmed with shame. Here Jack had been working himself into exhaustion to take care of him. Him. “I don’t deserve it, doc,” he said, his head still down.
“What?” Jack nearly gasped. “Of course you do.” He took Sawyer’s head in his hands, bringing his gaze up to meet his. “Like it or not, you matter to everyone here. People really care if you live or die.”
Sawyer searched Jack’s face, trying to determine how much bullshit the good doc was throwing his way. Curiously, he seemed to be telling the truth. “That’s just you,” Sawyer said, shrugging him off. “And you’re just obligated, being a doctor and all.”
“Sawyer, even if I weren’t a doctor, I would care what happened to you. And it’s not just because you saved my life. ”
Jack paused, afraid he may have already said too much. Why wouldn’t Sawyer listen to him? He had to fight an overwhelming urge to kiss Sawyer and show him how much he did care. But then he’d scare him away all over again and he couldn’t risk that.
There was a moment where he felt he could kiss him and Sawyer wouldn’t mind ... and then the moment passed and Jack sighed and stood up.
“That was weird,” Sawyer thought. For a second there, it seemed like Jack was about to kiss him. Even weirder, Sawyer had almost wanted him to. “Still feverish, ya damn lunatic,” he told himself, shaking his head.
Sawyer still felt “powerful weak,” as his granddad used to say, and he found it easier to nap than to get up again. When he next opened his eyes, Kate was there, making some more of that godawful tea.
“Hey there,” she said, smiling at him. “Jack said you were doing a lot better.”
“You’re a sight for sore eyes,” he said, flashing his dimples at her.
“Am I?” she said. There was something sad about her smile.
“Well, gosh, Freckles, hasn’t anyone been payin’ you any compliments while I’ve been under the weather?”
There it was again, that flash of sadness in her eyes.
“Oh, I get it,” he said. “You’re just jealous the doc’s been tied up with lil ol me.”
She started at that and then she broke out into a genuine smile. “You have been monopolizing Jack, haven’t you? You know you’re not the only one to ever need him around here. You’re going to have to work hard to top your last stunt if you want to keep him all to yourself.”
A shadow crossed Sawyer’s face. “It’s not a game.” He turned away from her with a frown.
“Sawyer, I was kidding,” she said, putting her hand on his shoulder. “I’m sorry.” He didn’t answer her. She leaned over, whispering in his ear. “What do you want, Sawyer?”
He turned to look at her and found her lips on his. She was practically climbing in his lap and he certainly wasn’t going to stop her. He felt a jolt go through him, reminding him that he wasn’t dead, and that he was suddenly feeling much better. He reached up, entangling his hands in her hair.
A noise that wasn’t quite a noise made them both look up. Jack stood in the doorway of the tent, a stricken expression on his face. Sawyer released Kate and she stood up guiltily.
“I was just leaving,” she said abruptly, brushing past Jack.
Jack looked over at Sawyer and then dropped his eyes.
“She started it, doc,” Sawyer said in a joking tone of voice, but then he saw how truly hurt Jack looked. “Oh man. So what the hell happened between you two while I was making like Rip Van Winkle?”
“Nothing,” Jack said heavily. “It’s none of my business what you or Kate do. You’re both adults.”
“Yeah, I’m a big boy and she’s a big girl,” Sawyer said. “But something tells me this big girl hasn’t been playing straight with either one of us.”
Jack let out a short, explosive laugh. “Since when have you cared about that, as long as you get her?”
“What, are you giving her to me?” Sawyer said, sitting up with some difficulty. “Because she might have something to say about that.” Jack didn’t say anything, just kept fixing him with that strange look. “Hell, doc, you and her got a thing goin’ on, I’ll back off. Least I can do, considerin’.”
“You’ll back off?” Jack laughed sharply. “Well, no need. There’s nothing going on between me and Kate.”
“Not now, you mean,” Sawyer said. “I may have just been out of it for two weeks but I’m not blind. You’re pining away over her.”
Jack gave him a look of pure anguish. “Can we stop talking about this, please?”
“Yeah, sure, doc,” Sawyer said with an exasperated sigh.
Jack stayed on in Sawyer’s tent that night, although it was probably the last night he could justify it on medical grounds.
Sawyer slept in his airplane chair and Jack on the ground. Surprisingly, Jack fell asleep first and Sawyer lay awake, trying to undo the puzzle of himself, Jack, and Kate. That girl needed to make up her mind, he thought. It wasn’t fair to him or the doc to keep playing them against each other. Frankly, the doc deserved better than that.
A low moan surprised Sawyer. It was coming from Jack. After a few more hoarse, nocturnal noises, Sawyer whistled silently to himself. The ol' doc was having himself an erotic dream, no doubt about Kate.
The sound of Jack’s moans made Sawyer feel almost like he had when Kate had kissed him earlier. It was high time he did something to remedy that. He reached his hand in his pants, sighing as he realized how long it had been since he’d been able to jerk off.
He tried using his right hand as usual, but the stitches in his arm pulled too painfully. Reluctantly, he switched to his left hand. It felt awkward, almost like someone else’s hand. As he found his grip, he thought, not of Kate, but of Jack’s strong doctor’s hands. With a stretch, he could imagine it was Jack’s hand around his cock, not his own, and the thought made him even harder.
It didn’t hurt that Jack was still uttering low moans not five feet away from him. Sawyer bit his lip not to make any noise as he neared climax. And then Jack moaned his name and Sawyer came in a blinding rush. He lay there gasping, still twitching from the intense orgasm. Jack was dreaming about him. And with that realization, Sawyer knew he wanted Jack, wanted him maybe more than he’d ever wanted anyone.
He couldn’t stop thinking about Jack’s touch. Or the look on his face when he told him how much Sawyer mattered to “everyone.” Or that no one, not even his own mother, had ever cared more for him or done more for him. Sawyer felt like he’d been knocked for a loop.
He was afraid. Afraid of taking the plunge. But even Sawyer, world-class masochist, wasn’t dumb enough to look a gift-horse like this in the mouth. He stood up shakily. He was still out of breath, but now his heart was racing for a new reason. He sat down next to Jack and gently shook him awake.
“You were dreamin,’ doc,” Sawyer said with a grin. “And it must have been a nightmare because you were sayin’ my name.”
Jack sat up suddenly, and even though it was dark, Sawyer would have bet half his stash that the good doc was blushing. “Oh my God,” Jack said in a strangled voice. “I’m so sorry I woke you up.”
“I’m not sorry,” Sawyer said. “I thought maybe I might help you make that dream come true.”
“What?!” Jack stammered, sure he wasn’t hearing Sawyer right.
Sawyer laughed, a low sound that rumbled in the back of his throat. “I thought I’d start by kissin’ you.” And before Jack could respond, his mouth was on Jack’s, his tongue forcing his lips open.
Jack’s head spun. Even though he was sure he was still dreaming, he kissed Sawyer back fiercely, his hands running over Sawyer’s back, his shoulder, his arms. Finally, they settled in Sawyer’s hair, keeping his head close to his. When they finally broke apart, they were both breathing hard.
"Wait! What about Kate?" Jack asked, still confused.
"What about her?" Sawyer as he took off Jack's shirt, followed by his own.
"I thought you wanted her."
"Not as much as I want you, dummy," Sawyer said hoarsely as he ran his good hand over Jack’s chest, stopping to flick his tongue over his nipples. If Jack wasn’t hard before, he sure was now.
“Sawyer,” he moaned, delirious at his touch. Sawyer kissed his way down Jack’s chest and stomach and suddenly Jack had trouble breathing. And then his heart threatened to stop working as Sawyer eased his pants off his hips. “Oh my God,” he gasped as Sawyer’s mouth closed on his cock. “Oh my God!” No dream was ever as good as this. No one was as ever as good as this.
Jack balled his fists in Sawyer’s hair, practically crying from pleasure as Sawyer’s tongue toyed with him. His brain had shut down completely and he gave himself over to the supremely sinful sensation of having Sawyer between his legs, his beard brushing his thighs. Sawyer’s hot, wet mouth was almost too delicious to bear as it worked its way up and down his shaft, and back to the sensitive tip.
Jack had stopped caring what kind of undignified sounds were escaping his lips. He didn’t care anymore if he screamed so loudly everyone came running. He came gasping Sawyer’s name, collapsing against him, his chest heaving, shudders still running up and down his body.
He found Sawyer’s mouth and kissed him again, slower this time, deeper, as if to say, “Now I’m yours.”
“Doc ... Jack,” Sawyer said softly but urgently. “I want your hands on me. Make me come, Jack.”
Make me come, Jack. In his wildest dreams, Jack never thought he’d hear Sawyer say that, and not in a voice so husky with desire that just the sound of it nearly had him coming. He let his hands roam over Sawyer’s taut body, careful to avoid his injured chest and arm. “Your ribs!” he said, suddenly, pulling back. “Jesus, Sawyer, are you OK?”
“Never better,” Sawyer said breathily. “You hit a problem spot, I’ll holler, ‘k?”
Jack resumed his tactile worship of Sawyer’s body. He grinned to hear Sawyer’s intake of breath as his hand closed around Sawyer’s dick. He spit into the palm of his hand and slid it slowly up and down, eliciting a low growl from Sawyer. With his other hand, Jack gripped the back of Sawyer’s neck and drew him in for another kiss. Sawyer panted into his mouth, moaning as Jack’s hand worked on him.
It was better than Sawyer had imagined, all that was missing was ...
“Moan for me,” Sawyer whispered. “I want to hear you.” His left hand wrapped around Jack’s dick and soon they were both hovering on the edge and Jack didn't have any trouble letting Sawyer hear just how he was making him feel. Sawyer's mouth was open against Jack's cheek, his breath coming in shallow bursts. As Jack's hand sped up, Sawyer's teeth nipped at his neck.
All the pain, all the misery he'd been through on this fucking island disappeared as Sawyer came with a cry, the sound turning into a whimper as he slumped wetly against Jack.
Jack cradled Sawyer’s head on his shoulder until he caught his breath and his trembling stopped. Sawyer’s hand relaxed and Jack belatedly realized how much an effort this must have been for him.
“Just rest,” he whispered in Sawyer’s ear. “That was quite a workout.”
“Yeah, doc,” Sawyer sighed and Jack could hear him grinning. “You tryin’ to make me relapse?”
“Well then I’ll just have to order lots of bedrest,” Jack said with a smile. “And I’ll have to watch you around the clock. And give you lots of hands-on treatment.”
“A guy could get used to that,” Sawyer said, kissing Jack’s collarbone as Jack laid them both down to sleep. "You know I'm a mess, Jack," Sawyer started to say. "Never really loved anyone..."
"Shhh," Jack said, his heart pounding strangely as he kissed Sawyer on the forehead. "We have all the time in the world to figure it out."
... and they lived smuttily ever after...
Thanks to demonickiwi for the original plot bunny and much supportive squeeing along the way, to everyone who's been reading this all along and to foxxcub who did the quickest beta ever and to whom I now owe at least one het smut story. ;->