Title: The Future is Now
Summary: Sawyer sees the past, the present and the future with Jack
Notes: I had this idea early on in S5 but now it's got a tiny bit of "Follow the Leader" in it. Thanks to zelda_zee for the super-quick beta.
Sawyer's eyes took a moment to adjust from bright sunshine to the relative gloom of a shaded clearing.
There was a man lying on the jungle floor and Sawyer's natural urge to rush over and help gave way to something like nausea when recognition set in. Those were his own boots, his own torn blue T-shirt, his own dirty blond hair smeared with mud and blood; the fresh white bandage on his arm looked completely out of place.
It was one thing to blunder into a moment from someone else's past, but to see himself lying there half-dead was a bit more of a shock. He didn't know what to do besides what he'd done before: lie low and wait for the next flash to end this unwelcome scene.
He hadn't noticed Jack and Kate at first: they were standing off to the side talking heatedly in low tones. The doc's once-white shirt was now gray with sweat and dirt and splatters of Sawyer's blood. Kate, somehow, didn't have a spot on her. She'd only knelt down, only kissed him, that's all the dirt she ever got on her. Jack, now, he looked almost as grimy and bloodied as Sawyer did lying there.
After a few more sharp words -- strange, he couldn't hear them, it seemed like he should be able to -- Jack and Kate approached the body on the jungle floor. At Jack's direction, they lifted him up, Jack holding Sawyer up by his arms, taking the bulk of his weight, while Kate took one leg on either side of her hips. They carried him awkwardly, shuffling step by step, to his own tent at the beach.
Sawyer followed -- what else could he do --- trying to keep out of sight, although he wondered if they could see him. He had the urge to step out of the shadows, into the same bright light and give them a damn funny scare, but he didn't. He just held his breath.
Kate said a few choice things to Jack about this all being his fault and then she stalked off angrily. Jack didn't seem to be affected by her words; he didn't flinch the way he had when Sawyer, bleeding out, sure he was going to die himself, had spit, "I'd watch you die." He remembered the way the doc's face had crumpled with hurt and the grim satisfaction he'd gotten from knowing he'd found just what button of Jack's to push.
He watched as Jack cut away his blue t-shirt, as he carefully washed round the bandage. Sawyer had realized someone probably washed him while he was knocked out, got all that dirt and blood and sweat off, he just never imagined it was Jack. Kate had been the one sitting there when he woke up; he'd credited the doc for the bandage and Kate for the rest.
But now he was watching as Jack gently washed the blood from Sawyer's hair, as Jack ran the washcloth slowly over Sawyer's chest. Funny, Sawyer could almost feel the cloth on his own bare chest. The thing that made him shiver, though, was the look in Jack's eyes. Something more than guilt there. Something more like....
Sawyer swore when the sky flashed again, when that ringing in his ears started up like it was never going to stop.
When it finally did, when he got his bearings again, he saw he was deep in the jungle. Two men in Dharma jumpsuits were arguing some distance away and his stomach flip-flopped to see that the men were himself and Jack. They both had blood streaming from their foreheads, their noses, like they'd been in one hell of a fight, one that was far from finished.
What they were shouting didn't make any sense to him; something about a bomb and their last chance and then -- holy fuck, he kissed Jack. That is, the other him grabbed Jack by the back of the head and held him there while he kissed him. And Jack kissed him right back, hard, desperate, his eyes closed tight, his pulse racing in his throat, even Sawyer could see that from where he stood.
He couldn't stop watching, try as he might, as the men roughly pulled at each other's uniforms, as they tugged them down far enough to free ... Christ, they were both hard, their hands wrapped around each other's cocks with a familiarity that let him know this wasn't the first time.
He looked away for a moment -- flushed with confusion and trying to deny his own arousal -- and when he looked back Jack was on his knees, Sawyer’s dick in his mouth. This had to be the future because he sure as hell would have remembered this scene from his past.
He heard himself say, "I wanna fuck you," And goddamn, but he had a raging hard-on himself now, biting his own lip not to cry out as his future self fucked the future doc up against a tree. The doc took it, took him with deepening grunts of pleasure and Sawyer --- both of him -- just completely lost it.
His eyes closed as he came hard into his own hand -- bright blinding light and then darkness flooded through him -- and it was only by the ringing in his ears that he knew he'd flashed again.
Sawyer is on his knees, gasping for breath. When his vision clears, he sees a man lying half in water. The roar in his ears is now just the waterfall below him and he dives down without thinking, because he can see from here that the man is Jack and that he's not moving.
The plunge into the cold water clears his head, thank god, and he tries to stay calm as he reaches Jack's side. He lays a finger on Jack's neck and yes, there's a pulse there. He turns Jack over and pulls him to solid ground. There's a gash on his forehead, nothing too deep but there's a lot of blood. Sawyer wishes he had a shirt or something to wipe it away. He undoes Jack's tie -- crazy, just like the one he wore that first day, the day of the crash -- and dabs it on Jack's forehead.
As Jack's eyelids flicker open, Sawyer realizes that this is the now, the part that comes after that first bloody scene in the clearing, the part before the two of them are frantically fucking up against a tree.
Jack raises his hand to his head, his eyes not leaving Sawyer's face and he knows that this moment is the turning point. He's not sure what to do next, whether he should try to stop what he saw from happening or rush headlong into making it happen right now.
"Sawyer?" Jack's voice seems to break on his name. "What are you doing?" he asks, trying to sit up.
"Just repayin' a favor," Sawyer smiles and Jack, this Jack, the one right here with him and looking at him like he's a ghost or something, has no idea what he's talking about.
He helps Jack to his feet, slowly, and Jack's groggy enough that he has to lean against him. Sawyer's arm goes around Jack's waist, bearing the weight of Jack's body as they walk, to where, Sawyer can't say. All he knows is that they're walking there together.